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### People always want to know, if the man is not the head, who makes the tough decisions?

As you saw in yesterday’s post, I recently read the fantastic book, Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together, by Mark and Grace Driscoll.

I raised the question of whether there can be two differing views on marriage. The two views are :

Complementarian. – this is taken from passages pertaining to the order of Creation (Gen. 2:21-22), curses associated with the introduction of sin (Gen. 3:16), and Ephesisan 5:22 and Colossians 3:18 which state wives must submit to husbands. This is viewed as the male being the head.

Egalitarian. – this view is rooted in a belief that male and female are created equal in the image of God (Gen. 1:27), that they are to submit one to another (Eph. 5:21), and there is an interdependency that is needed in the marriage (1 Cor. 11:11).

“Marriage is about friendship.”(page 23)

I recently finished reading Mark and Grace Driscoll’s book, “Real Marriage: The Truth About Sex, Friendship, and Life Together“. This is absolutely needed in the church today. In fact, in nearly 30 years as a believer, I have never seen this issue hit so head on.

I so appreciate Mark and Grace’s honesty in opening up their past and marriage to public scrutiny. Their basic premise, before diving into an overview of marriage as well as very specific “can you do that” questions, is that marriage is based on a friendship. So often marriage is about a feeling of love. This shows a view that is much more African, one where marriage is a choice and a commitment.